Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Nothing New to Report

So, we have been 'live' or 'paper pregnant' for just about two months now. Even though that is a relatively short amount of time, it feels as if we are in this limbo state. Before, I felt like we were moving one step closer to adopting, with every question we answered, and every form we filled out. But now, it seems less real. Before, when people asked how the adoption process was going, I had an answer "well, we just did our fingerprints...." or " we just finished designing the birthletter" Now, it is "we are waiting'. I can already tell that people don't bring it up as often as they did, maybe for fear that it will hurt my feelings, and for the most part I am glad there are less questions, because how many clever ways are there to say "still waiting"? On the other hand, the less it gets talked about, the less real it all feels. I am not sure if that makes any sense.

I have bought a few baby outfits, so that helps. But it is hard to escape the fact that it feels like I am pretending. Pretending to get prepared for our pretend baby? I think this is exaggerated even more because I feel like I am the only one getting excited over baby clothes, or that others think its weird to buy clothes for a baby that is not there yet. Maybe that is all in my imagination or maybe I am just in a mood.

On a lighter note, I see that I have six followers now! Yay! I hope that my downer of a post doesn't scare you all away!

6 comments:

  1. I think I will be in the same boat soon. We just handed over the last of the paperwork to the homestudy social worker and just have a few more forms for the agency. At least starting school will keep me busy!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Wow, I could've written this post myself!! I can relate to everything you are saying. I feel as though I was much more prepared for adoption and becoming a mother 6 months ago than I am now, even though we are closer to that reality now than 6 months ago.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I can totally relate and we haven't even started yet. lol :)

    ReplyDelete
  4. Thanks guys. It does make me feel better knowing I am not alone!

    ReplyDelete
  5. You'll get there! Just a matter of time. I know, that's the hard part!

    ReplyDelete
  6. I remember thinking that, when our wait started. It seemed much more bearable when we were DOING something. The ALLOWING-to-happen part of the unfolding process was much harder for me.

    I wish you well, Kammnie.

    ReplyDelete